The Silence that Builds Communion
Following the Example of St Dominic
A Word from the Desert
Abba Theodore of Pherme asked Abba Pambo, “Give me a word.” With much difficulty he said to him, “Theodore, go and have pity on all, for through pity, one finds freedom of speech before God”.
A Word from a Brother
It is said of St. Dominic that he either spoke with God or of God. Historical accounts depict him as a kind and joyful man, deeply empathetic towards all he encountered. He would call to mind all during long nights spent in prayer, talking with God. His earnest desire for the salvation of all humanity often moved him to tears of compassion for those who had lost their way; for them, he pined, constantly repeating: "My God, my Mercy, what will become of sinners?"
In this regard, St. Dominic perfectly embodies the wisdom of this saying by Abba Pambo, who closely linked our capacity for mercy towards others with our ability to engage in genuine conversation with God. This suggests that as long as we harbour disdain for our neighbours, our prayers are hollow echoes rather than authentic exchanges with the One who cherishes all humanity. Indeed, as the Scriptures admonish, " With [the tongue] we bless the Lord and Father, and with it we curse those who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this ought not to be so. " (James 3:9-10).
The gauge of our spiritual well-being lies precisely in the words we utter, as Jesus taught: " it is out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth speaks" (Luke 6:45). Hence, silence lies at the core of the Desert Fathers' teachings. Not merely the absence of speech, but the restraint from words that are death-dealing for our neighbours. As Abba Poemen wisely observed, "A man may seem to be silent, but if his heart is condemning others he is babbling ceaselessly".
Rowan Williams aptly notes that " silence somehow reaches to the root of our human problem". While silence alone may not eradicate our negative feelings, this ascetic discipline serves as a vital initial step towards inner transformation. This underscores Pope Francis's frequent admonitions against the perils of gossip!
The true purpose of words is communication. They should build community by fostering communion. It is no coincidence that these three terms are all etymologically interrelated.
Until our words foster communion – like St Dominic - we will also be precluded from communicating with God freely and without hypocrisy. Therefore, what better Lenten practice than abstaining from words lacking in mercy? After all, " If any think they are religious, and do not bridle their tongues but deceive their hearts, their religion is worthless. " (James 1:26).
A Prayer for the Road Ahead
O Lord,
who has mercy upon all,
take away from me my sins,
and mercifully kindle in me the fire of Your Holy Spirit.
Take away from me the heart of stone,
and give me a heart of flesh,
a heart to love and adore You,
a heart to delight in You,
to follow and to enjoy You,
for Christ’s sake. Amen.
(St Ambrose of Milan, 337–397 AD)
Picture: Fra Angelico, St Dominc of Guzman, Florence, San Marco, from Wikimedia Commons